This blog spot may be a little bit more of a "meta" take on skin to skin but I think it will resonate with whomever it is meant to resonate with.
There is nuance all throughout so read with as much of an open mind as you can. If anything written here causes you to roll your eyes, good.
-That's the moment that nuance can be received & formulated into a different level of understanding from just one view point- this is a good thing.
The intention is to offer a perspective different from others. And although I'll never attempt to undermine logic and reason, I'd argue the spiritual, empathetic side is not only imperative to recognize as well but completely symbiotic...the differences don't actually cross contaminate.
Frankly, I do not understand how we don't see it this way but I also do understand why we have not been able to see it this way. Two things can always simultaneously exist.
So, with that being said, the importance of skin to skin cannot be expressed enough.
When a child is in utero, they are the closest they will ever be to another human being.
Quite literally surrounded by warmth that is nourishment. It's a specific environment that allows growth. The most secure environment a human being can be in. Once exiting the portal of life, we are immediately the most vulnerable we will ever be. Completely defenseless.
This will absolutely cause distress.
The measure of this, should not solely be based on the expressions voiced -or not voiced- by either party involved.
Birth is inherently transforming and transformation is almost always somewhat traumatic.
The first bond shouldn't just be a trauma bond.
We need mother.
We need her warmth.
We need her nourishment.
We need her.
She is source.
She is healing.
She is the energy we sustained in.,
That need for her sustenance does not dissipate the second the first breath is taken.
Mother is life, itself.
Skin to skin promotes connection.
Regulates heart rates.
Lowers cortisol levels.
Whether skin to skin with the other partner or with mother, the connection is the healing needed. This has been proven in science but it is not spoken enough about in a spiritual or possibly more "relatable" aspect. Not all of us think the same ways.
Skin to skin can aide in the feeling of security when stress and anxiety is present. That's why mothers can feel the overwhelming expectations of motherhood yet ultimately settle into the comfort of holding her baby close to her.
The connection cuts out the noise.
It balms overstimulation, giving vitality back to the mother to care for her family.
It calms the most vulnerable parts of life.
Skin to skin is healing energy, itself.
It is amazing that we can do this.
Feminine energy is source, itself.
That energy should be respected to flourish.
If you are having a baby and are afraid to ask your provider if you can do skin to skin, I highly encourage you to find another provider if you can. Even if some separation is needed, you can still request your rights to your child and your own autonomy.
There will always be a possibility of separation being needed to ensure the well being of the child or mother but there are measure of touch that can be taken. You won't know if you don't ask.
If all else fails, which ever birth partner you have with you can do skin to skin as well.